Friday, May 30, 2008

Some people should just stay home...

Oh no! This story is just too precious! You think this guy, being a lawyer, should be at least somewhat maybe perhaps vaguely smart. But noooooo!
And now he acts like he’s the only passenger ever, whose "vacation turned into a nightmare after his family was stranded in an airport for days and treated disdainfully by airlines employees." What a schmuck!

Mr. Lawyer, I guess you haven’t been traveling much these days, have you?

But let’s start from the top.

1.    Why did you book such a close connection in Atlanta? Especially when connecting to an international flight? In Atlanta! And especially when traveling from NYC? On Delta! During the Christmas vacation season!

Hmmm… How do you say “an IQ of a stool sample?”

If your flight from NYC was only 2 (yes, ONLY TWO) hours late, and you were denied boarding for your connecting flight to Buenos Aires, that means you (or your secretary, if she booked your tickets) knows zilch about air travel. Your connection was too close, and of course you missed it! Did you really think you could comfortably make a two-hour transfer from a domestic flight (from NYC!) to an international one? In Atlanta!

Let’s just hope that your secretary, if she indeed booked your tickets, has huge bazongas, because obviously she’s not all that when it comes to brain power.

And if you booked this flight yourself, then you got exactly what you deserved.

2.    Of course being a tightwad, you flew economy. Because if you were a first class crowd, they would have let you board late, or wouldn’t have told you that the next available flight was 2 weeks later. Trust me! You’d be whisked away to a lounge and sorted out in no time.

So not only you are dumb as a doorknob (or hire secretaries based on the size of their chests), you’re also a cheap doorknob.

And now you think you can sue Delta for 1 million dollars, because “through its gross negligence, malfeasance and absolute incompetence”, your vacation was ruined.

I have two words for you – travel insurance.

But why am I having this very strange psychic feeling that you were too cheap for that, too?
Wait, how did you describe Delta? Absolute incompetence? Or was that a reference to your own travel planning skills?

Well, Mr. Lawyer, thanks for the laughs, and good luck with your lawsuit!


(Photo courtesy of caribb. Thanks!)

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