Kayabuki in Utsunomiya - Where Waiters Are Monkeys

We were bored today and thought that seeing a couple of monkeys in goofy costumes would be a swell idea. No, we didn’t go to a cosplay event, we went to Kayabuki.

Kayabuki is a restaurant (actually, an izakaya, to be precise) in the Miyukihoncho part of Utsunomiya (address: 4688-13 Miyukihoncho, parking available) where two monkeys work as waiters (or waitresses – sorry I didn't feel like pulling down underpants). Their names are Yacchan (presumably a boy) and Fukuchan (presumably a girl, though I’m not sure).

Tonight only Fukuchan was on duty. And let me tell you, the masked and wigged monkey in the mask was a very creepy sight.

And if not for those monkeys, there would be no reason for Kayabuki (phone: 028-662-3751) to be famous. It’s a less-than-average izakaya. Somewhat dirty and grungy, but not enough to be a skanky dive. The food is OK, but just barely this side of OK. The service is non-existent. No wonder then that when a British TV crew visited Kayabuki some time ago, some customers said that the monkeys were actually better waiters. At least they brought you things, which cannot be said about the human staff.

Do you want a hot towel?

We were being purposely ignored for about 30 minutes. So much effort went into that ignoring that I was beginning to worry that mamma-san and her helper might sprain their necks from turning their heads to avoid looking at us.

But when we finally managed to place our order (teppanyaki x2 and oolong tea x2), the food arrived relatively quickly. Mamma-san’s helper for some very strange reason insisted on explaining the menu to us in English. Even though Dr. Trouble was answering her in perfect Japanese.

Inside Kayabuki

Oh yeah, the menu… ignore the fancy menu posted on the wall. The one with stuff like boar, deer and duck. There’s none of that, that menu is just for show. Today’s choices were: teppanyaki with chicken and tofu with meat. Plus the usual sides of kimchi, gyoza and tempura (which consisted mostly of onions).

Tonight we were treated to only one monkey, Fukuchan. And thank goodness, because that was enough to creep me out. The monkey did her schtick of delivering hot towels for about 30 minutes and then disappeared behind the bar.

Fukuchan getting friendly with customers

That was our cue to pay and leave. Oh yeah, speaking of paying… Our bill should have been 2200 yen (teppanyaki 900yen x2, plus oolong tea 200 yen x2), but we were charged 2600 yen and no explanation was forthcoming as to why. I was planning to leave a tip for the monkey (the sign on the wall asks you to do just that) but after being overcharged 400 yen, I changed my mind.

Fukuchan sans the creepy mask

Conclusion: it was interesting for one night, but we won’t be back. I can ignore nasty attitude (god knows, I have plenty of that myself) but I won’t put up with being ripped off.

Here's a short film, sorry about the cellphone camera quality:

PS. And you better not mess with Yacchan, he is 4th dan in karate:

Comments

[Candice]

Dude, wtf?! That is the creepiest monkey EVER. I think I'd at least have to eat there just to see the whole thing though. Despite the shitty service.

[Billy W]

Would love to see that monkey have an off night, chuck a loaded beer bottle at an obnoxious oyaji, then bolt out the door and into the wild, never to return.

[someoddity]

400 yen is a pretty average seating charge for an izakaya. it's called "otoshi" and it usually comes in the form of some little morsel, ranging from completely worthless to kinda tasty, that you didn't order appearing on your table. often izakaya and bars will charge this per person, and it is never mentioned. it is kind of a rip, but a common one in japan.

[Anna Ikeda]

Some oddity,
Oh! An izakaya expert, great! Unfortunately, we didnt get any such morsel and others who visited the place before us were not treated to the 400 yen surcharge. And if its per person, as you say, so how come we didnt get charged 800 yen (for 2 of us), huh?

And oddly enough, we never got that charge at any other place weve been to. The two hags behind the bar simply assumed we were dumb foreigners or out of towners, because we didnt have thick as shit Tochigi accents, thats all.

Candice,
yeah, I know. WTF was my reaction, too.

Billy,
and what would that poor monkey do outside? All it knows is to sit on the sink and deliver hot towels and beer bottles. I suppose it could get a job at a gas station, though.